5-star books w/ so-called unlikeable female leads
don't worry, baby...everything will turn out all right
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Okay, onto the stuff.
Here are all the books I read this month. I read each book in one day. I read them in between and sometimes during occular migraines and other random illnesses. I rated them all five stars because while I might be an unlikeable female character myself, I’m not a little bitch.
Also, my dog almost died, but she/we all survived.
Also, I cry every day because life so sad world so sad politics so bad.
Anyway. Let’s talk about books for a minute.
1. Luster by Raven Leilani
A deeply uncomfortable, deeply funny story about a young Black woman who engages in an affair with an older white man in an open marriage. The prose has a certain distance to it that I usually find suspicious, but our MC, Edie, is so delectably fucked up, so shamelessly messy, honest, and relatable that I unabashadly love her. Leilani’s attention to detail constructs a reality so tangible that the book feels more like a confessional memoir than a work of fiction. And when I say the jokes are deeply funny, I mean it. They hit so slyly at the end of a sentence, you almost never see them coming.
2. Interesting Facts About Space by Emily Austin
The real true crime is the lies we believe about ourselves, isn’t it? Interesting Facts About Space follows the story of a partially-hearing, disabled queer woman who is obsessed with true crime and, you could probably guess, space. She’s also a commitmentphobe with hidden trauma that she’d really rather not get into.
This book reads one quarter-thriller/mystery, three-quarters women’s fiction, and that feels purposeful given the function of the true-crime element… which, while treated with humor is not solely framed as a funny-ha-ha thing women obsess over but more of a personal symptom of a larger illness within our society.
(For the record, I think the true crime genre is v. bad and think you should stop consuming it).
3. Monsters: A Love Story by Liz Kay
One could technically classify this book as capital R Romance, but love story really is a more apt description given the tone of the book. Actually, I take that back. Fantasy is a more accurate genre classification for this one, once you realize the story is about a virtually unknown poet getting plucked from obscurity by a hot, wealthy, A-list actor who wants to make a movie out of her gnarly book of feminist poems and also…wants to make sweet, sweet love to the poet herself. Like, hello. (But this isn’t some open-door spiced up romance, so don’t go looking for that. There are a lot more broken bottles shattered on kitchen floors than blow jobs).
It’s a volatile story as the title suggests and the author does the unthinkable: she actually makes me, at times, despise the Female Lead. I’m still not sure how to metabolize this one given it’s 2016 publication date.
For instance, when the Female Lead strictly controlls her children’s food intake (mandating they only eat five chips at a birthday party at one point), are we supposed to believe this is good and healthy parenting? Or is this a clear example of monster behavior? The book hints at the Female Lead’s eating disorder, but it confusingly never actually lands on a judgment of her actions towards her children one way or another. But don’t worry, because you’ll be reminded several times during your reading how thin she is (sorry, but massive eye roll to that).
Still, I found myself thinking about this one a lot after I read it.
4. Bunny by Mona Awad
My favorite book of the year. Although fair warning, the author does randomly use an ableist slur for no reason within the text (I think it’s a case of an author getting just a little too wrapped up in a prose before bros mentality, if you know). But overall, this book is creepy, horror-adjacent, existential, meta, and darkly hilarious, with a voice so unique and so hypnotic that it seeps into my own thoughts even weeks later when I’m least expecting it. I love you, Bunny. Bunny, I love you. Go bring us a bunny, Bunny. She doesn’t even like Pinkberry. Fuck you, poets.
5. You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat
A story about a queer Palestinian-American woman struggling with both substance use disorder and “love addiction”, as well as a tumultuous relationship with her mother.
I mean, who doesn’t relate? Strictly speaking our female MC really does engage in some classically unlikeable behavior: she cheats on her girlfriend, she falls into limerence often and with the wrong people (a professor, for instance), and she cowers under her mother’s homophobic judgments.
But when she plunges into the hard work TM of imperfect healing, you will root for her so whole heartedly that at times, it will bring you to tears but also make you laugh. (And honestly, I liked her when she was being quote unquote terrible, too.)
6. Ripe by Sarah Rose Etter
Ripe is a bad dream happening while you’re still awake. Our unlikeable MC is, on the surface, doing well for herself. She works for a tech company, lives in San Francisco, dates a cool chef. But beneath the her coke-aided veneer, she is splitting at the seams, barely able to afford her rent, and cohabitating with a literal Black Hole.
The metaphor is obvious and effective. We all live with Black Holes. Sometimes, they comfort us like familiar friends and occassionally they threaten to swallow us up. Sometimes we wish they would. But either way, all people contend with their very own Black Holes one way or another. Anyway, I’m jealous I didn’t think of this concept first because it’s genius.
7. Going Dutch by James Gregor
Not a female lead, but certainly could be classified as unlikeable which almost never happens with the same deft swiftness as leading female counterparts.
Going Dutch is a story about Richard, a self identifed gay man living beyond his means in New York while pursuing his doctorate in esoteric/obscure/Italian-language related things (honestly, I’ve forgotten the exact detail on this part, my apologies). When Richard becomes enmeshed both academically and sexually with one of his wealthier and more talented female colleagues, he puts his very writer’s block laden academic career and personal life at great risk.
The voice and prose in Going Dutch is so beautifully and carefully considered that my own writing was greatly influenced after I finished this book. The main character is complex, nuanced, and ruthlessly truthy in the unlikeability of his loneliness.
p.s. I noticed the reviews are rough on this one and to that I say what the actual fuck??? This book was masterfully written. Beautifully told. Perfectly constructed. Sorry if people can’t handle a challenging character. Sorry if you have to personally like every decision a fictional character makes. Sorry if you can’t look within yourself enough to see your own unlikeable qualities to understand somebody’s elses. Jesus fucking christ. I’m actually angry.
8. Milk Fed by Melissa Broder
If you asked me what Milk Fed is about in a couple words, I would say: eating disorders, gender identities, boobs, being gay, and dairy. My second favorite book of the year. Melissa Broder is a poet and you know it when you read her prose which are lush, transulcent, gorgeous, and at times ephemeral, slipping away as soon as they are conjured. Still, Milk Fed is less fantastical and more grounded than some of the other titles I’ve read from Broder, and, I’ll tell you what, it worked for me.
Where to find me, you’re most unlikeable female lead:
Full Length Novels:
Novellas: